God Works in Mysterious Ways

Background: I've never been able to sing "Jesus Loves Me" to Clayton. Why? We sang it at Shawn's funeral, and I've just never been able to make it through the whole thing without coming to tears. So I gave up singing it for Clayton a long time ago. He does know it because my mom sings it with him and one of his therapists sings it as well--I'm glad they've been able to teach it to him.

The rest of the story: Yesterday while I was giving Clayton his bath we had a quite moment and he started singing something. Took me a few seconds to figure out that he was singing "Jesus Loves Me!" I asked him and he smiled and kept singing. So I mustered up the courage to finish the song with him--I sang right along with the tears flowing. Isn't it amazing how God uses children to send his love right directly to us? It literally felt like I had been given a big ole' hug by Jesus himself. Definitely what I needed to make it through the day.

Thirty Minutes of Wonderful

For my baby, who went to Heaven four years ago today. Thank you, Lord for our short time with him. Journaling: It was easily the hardest night of my life. But in retrospect, I count the experience as a sweet blessing. I had been there as Shawn entered the world, and on this night and morning, it was a privilege to be there as he left us. How many other mothers have the opportunity to literally rock their baby into the arms of Jesus? My baby is lucky. He will never know the heartaches of this world. He will never struggle with the unknown effects of his early birth. He will always be innocent. He will always be perfect. For me, my time with him will be some of the very minutes that make my lifetime special.

I Think I'm Losing It

**I've forgotten to buckle Clayton in his wheelchair twice since the wreck

**I came in from Wal-Mart the other day and forgot to unload my car (which included a gallon of milk)--let the stuff sit out there for about 45 minutes before I realized I had never unloaded it!

**I was searching for the peanut butter yesterday and couldn't find it in the cabinet even though I knew we had a new jar--finally found it right next to the jelly in the refrigerator where I had put it the day before.

**I realized yesterday afternoon that I had only shaved one leg in the shower yesterday morning.

I'm not sure I should be allowed out alone, much less be allowed to take care of a child!!

First Name Basis

For a while now Clayton has been calling Brian by his first name. "Hi Brian." "Bye Brian." He interchanges Brian and Daddy when talking about him, but now he's decided he likes to call everyone by their first name! Pop gets called Phillip and Granny gets called Mar-wee. He seems to really like saying Mary, not sure why he's started this but I keep correcting him on it--POP AND GRANNY. He actually doesn't ever mention my name unless someone asks him to repeat it. I remember my niece went through a phase of calling my brother by his first name--maybe it's just something a lot of kids do?? And although I don't want him to get used to it, it is cute to hear him say our names--he's a smart little guy. :)

Let's Talk TV

So when Clayton came home from the hospital I got hooked on CourtTV. I don't sit and watch every minute, but I do keep it on for "company" throughout the day and kind of half listen for something really interesting to happen. And since I'm such a rut person, I've been a little upset with them for a while. First Kimberly Newsome left, then another anchor left and they changed up all the shows. Then Catherine Crier left. I started looking around and realized that it looks like the network was bought by Turner Broadcasting or something to that effect. Then Nancy Grace left a couple of months ago and they can't get anyone decent in her spot. And now they are advertising Star Jones' new show starting next week. Ugh. And the court coverage ends an hour earlier and I've been FORCED to turn it to Dr. Phil for lack of anything else on at 3:00. So I've become interested in his show against my will . . . . :) I've never been interested in those goofy shows that analyze someone's problems simply because I've got enough problems without adding other people's! I guess it's a good thing I'm not at home as much anymore since my little old CourtTV channel has changed so much because I can't deal with soap operas and Oprah . . . .

All I Have to Say Is . . .

It was 96 degrees at 10:00 last night, with a heat index of 99 degrees. That pretty much tells you everything.

It's Just HOT

It's pretty much too hot to do anything around here. I spent Saturday doing laundry and when I looked at the thermostat in the afternoon, it read 77. The air ran almost all day and it didn't catch up until that night. Talk about miserable! Brian went out to the lake with a friend of his and he said it was too hot in the lake--that's pretty bad when it's too hot to go swimming!!! Clayton has ANOTHER doctor's appointment today in Little Rock. It seems like those things always come all at the same time. I'm not looking forward to going down there in this heat. We have to go again tomorrow to the GI doctor. Lovely plans for over 100 degree days . . . .

Happy Birthday Clayton!!!

Clayton is FOUR YEARS OLD today! We had a pool party last night for him. He loved it and if ever there was a day for a pool party, yesterday was it. IT WAS HOT!!! Almost everyone got in! I only took about ten pics so I'm uploading some a friend of ours took. He cried through the Happy Birthday song (just like last year!) and he really didn't want to try any cake, but at least he didn't gag this year. But by far, his favorite place to be was in the pool with his Granny. He didn't want to swim unless she was there, and didn't want to get out unless she was getting out!

Wheelchair Wreck!

My poor baby! While on our way into clinic yesterday I let go of his wheelchair for a split second only to see him roll off the ledge of the sidewalk and flip over onto the parking lot! It was horrible! He was under the wheelchair and had landed right on his head (as you can see from the picture). He looks even worse today because everything has scabbed over--I know everyone's thinking "what did you do to that poor child???!" I was just as traumatized as he was, if not more so. I cried, his O. T. cried, and Clayton cried! I even had them call the paramedics because all I could think was shunt malfunctions and siezures! By the time the paramedics left, he was smiling and saying hi to everyone, but it sure was a close call. Thank God he's okay!!! (And now we get to have cute little fourth birthday photos with battlescars--guess he really is becoming a little boy!)

We Surprised Them!!!

We rolled into the Scrapbook Warehouse and caught EVEYRONE off guard! Only three ScrapJazzers knew I was coming and that we were bringing Clayton to Dallas this weekend--I'm so glad we were able to keep it a secret--it was awesome to see the surprised looks and tears and smiles from everyone! I've never seen so many cameras flashing--I felt like I was with a celebrity! Clayton was more than a little overwhelmed, he was just sitting there staring at everyone. He did eventually start asking everyone for hugs since I was hugging everyone. He won everyone over immediately! He was a lot better when the crowd was small, I only wish everyone could have seen him relaxed enough to talk and carry on. I think I've already got Brian talked into next year in San Antonio and I can't wait. I loved this get together because we didn't have a bunch of classes dictating our schedule--we just cropped and visited. LOVED IT!

It Must Be Good

Yesterday I posted this layout in my galleries at ScrapJazz and Create My Keepsake. It's one of those layouts that you want to be so special and then it doesn't turn out as planned--BUT, it must be some kinda good because it was chosen as Layout of the Day on BOTH sites! One of them would have been great, but BOTH? WOW! Makes me feel a lot better about what I had considered a mess up!

Little Obsessions

This boy is definitely obsessive about many things (comes by it honestly, I'm the same way)! He loves feet, hair, wants to pick EVERYONE'S nose, and he loves to watch ANY cleaning! Sweeping and dusting are some favorites, and changing the sheets can entertain him to the max! And while he used to be deathly afraid of the vacuum, he now just sits around asking for it! I finally got it out yesterday and he was thrilled when he got to actually hold the handle. Then he said "vacuum Momma" which translated to me needing to do some housework! So I vacuumed for him yesterday and what do you know, he wanted to get it out again today! He threw a little fit when I said maybe later--I guess he's in tune with all the dirt in this house and knew it wouldn't hurt to vacuum again! It's still sitting here next to him because he starts whining everytime I try to put it up! Oh, the joys of a toddler--their way or no way!!

I've Got a Praise!

We saw Dr. Berlinski yesterday (Clayton's Pulmonologist) and he gave me the go ahead on taking more drastic measures on weaning Clayton off his oxygen! Although we've known Clayton can handle small stints off the oxygen (since he pulls his cannula off all the time!), we've been waiting for the official okay from a doctor--VERY BIG NEWS! Right now it's just two hours a day, but eventually we will work up to four hours if he can handle it and then we'll go back for another evaluation. He just does so well during the summer, there really is no reason to hold back. In the summer, he does better on breathing in general, and even with the theraputic feeds. He is better about trying things in his mouth simply because he's not congested at all and not fighting to breath as a result of being sick.

And so here he sits withOUT his cannula--isn't he even prettier without that thing!? And don't tell him I said pretty when he's 15! His oxygen is still running in the high 90s, so he's handling it well. I'm hoping he keeps up the good work! Heaven knows all this talking he's been doing should be giving his lungs a great workout! His breath support is better than ever and I really think he's ready for these baby steps . . .gives us hope for the bigger steps!

And as a side note, Dr. Berlinski had to suffer through a picture for me. (I explained that I was a scrapbooker and I document everything in Clayton's life). I've decided to do a mini-album of Clayton's doctors, and he just happened to be the first victim! He was a little upset because he didn't have his tie on, but I told him he was dressed perfect since they both had on blue--I'm such a nerd scrapbooker! :)

I'm With the Band

Here are some photos from our first gig (outside of a our church's services). Overall, everything went well--we only had a few hiccups that can be easily fixed later. Everyone was very complimentary and Pastor Tim even invited us to play for an outside baptism service in August. Guess he thought we were pretty good. :) But most importantly, we enjoyed ourselves--gave us a taste of something we definitely want to continue doing . . .(**remember that you can double click on the pics to see them enlarged). Thank you so much, Annette for taking the pics for us!

Friday

**started organizing my printed pics last night, off to Hobby Lobby for more photo boxes while they are on sale.

**visiting my grandparents today since I haven't seen them since before the Florida trip.

**need to order a ton of pics--I'm itching to scrap something new and fresh.

**just finished a baby album for some friends of ours--lovin' how it came out.

**worrying that it will rain tomorrow while we are playing. Don't want heat, but would rather not play in the rain.

**cancelling and rescheduling Clayton's dentist appt. for Monday--don't have the energy to deal with that doctor (he thinks Clayton should be able to have his teeth cleaned with no sedation. HELLO--the kid can't stand anything in his mouth!!!) I've already put my foot down about it, but I really don't want to deal with it next week, especially since he said his teeth look great right now (for a G-tube fed child).

**Clayton is a such a star. He is the "model patient" for P.T. students tomorrow at UCA and he has also been asked to be the patient for an in-service at the clinic next spring. :)

**got his pool party scheduled--look for invitations soon!

The Band

The band finally has a name . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Solid Rock Blues Commission

How's that for a mouthful?!! Simply put, we didn't want a "predictable" name. We were looking for something with some personality, kind of in the tradition of a "Creedence Clearwater Revival" type thing if you know what I mean. Our first gig (not including church) is this Saturday. We are playing outside in the heat of the afternoon. I'm hoping we make it through without collasping from heat exhaustion! Wish us luck!

July IMCK Card Kit

Here are the cards I made with the July Kit from InspireMeCardKits.com:

More Botox

Clayton had his second set of botox injections this morning. We had to be at the hospital at 5:30 a.m. YUCK. I had my alarm set for 3:50, and he woke up crying around 3:00, so we ended up just getting up then. So by the time we got settled in pre-op, he was TIRED. And we usually find him in recovery throwing a fit, giving the nurses a run for the money--but today he was snoozing away. Guess that gas sent him into lala land!

We're Back!

Home again, home again, jiggity jig! We got home yesterday morning around 4:00 am--FUN! I think we've finally recovered from the long drive home from Jacksonville. We got plenty of relaxation time in Pensacola. It rained a little in the afternoons, but we got plenty of sun . . .we thought we were so smart taking our own umbrella, but Brian got burnt sitting under it the first day! It helps to have an umbrella made of THICK material that actually blocks UV rays! Little Clayton was covered in sunscreen and still got a little pink that day. We felt horrible! He didn't seem bothered by it but for the next two days we just rented the umbrella from the beach service guy. Worked much better for us because it was one less thing to carry!

For the Fourth, we drove over to Brian's uncle's house in Navarre. We had our own little fireworks show in their backyard. I worried that Clayton wouldn't like them, but he loved watching the lights. The sparklers made him a little nervous. Can't blame him, they make me a little nervous too!

We stayed at a great hotel--very family friendly. Can't take credit for this pic--Brian took it . . .

We drove over to Jacksonville on Friday and Brian went deep sea fishing with his brother on Saturday. I'm so glad he got to go--he's been dying to go for years now. They caught a lot, and this is what they chose to bring home:

We had a great trip--now we'll have to get on back to normal life. Which for someone like me who loves a schedule, isn't all that bad. :)

On Vacation

We'll be in Florida for the next week, so look for me then . . .in the spirit of the Fourth I'll share more pics from the Korean War Memorial Dedication.

God Bless America!