Old Friends

We had some extra time at the hospital today so I thought I would visit the NICU to see some old friends. These two ladies helped take excellent care of Clayton (and his family!). Amelia (on the left) holds such a special place in my heart--she was one of Shawn's primary nurses and was taking care of him the morning he died. I eventually talked her into being a primary nurse for Clayton and she helped nurse my hurts just as much as she did his. I learned a lot about grieving and dealing with heartache from her--and definitely a lot about "rising from the ashes" in spite of your circumstances. Peggy (on the right) was a superwoman of a nurse! She is now a nurse practitioner in the NICU and I've never learned so much about preemies and other NICU issues as I did from this woman. I also gained a lot of confidence from Peggy--it was hard to be the mom when so many people were involved in my baby's care, but she pushed me to just take the bull by the horns. And because of that I learned early that I was Clayton's parent, advocate, and ultimately the one in charge. She spent many an hour taping ventilator tubes and IV lines so that I could hold Clayton even though he was in such a fragile condition. She was determined to help me bond with my baby as much as possible despite the circumstances.

I was so glad they got to see Clayton "all grown up." He didn't really talk much, but he did want to hug them and did say a few words after he got used to them. He showed them how well he could stand up and even tried to take a few steps. He never was completely settled though because he had a lot of people to watch and keep tabs on since we were standing by the door and main desk of the unit. But he was all smiles when Amelia brought her camera out--too bad he wouldn't look at me with my camera!

It was because of these women and Clayton's other primary nurses that we were able to leave the NICU each day knowing full well he had the best care. It's amazing to think that my baby lived at the hospital for 6 1/2 months---THANK GOD for special nurses and doctors who take such a personal interest in their patients and families! We couldn't have made it without them!